Allies and loved ones of people who are neurodivergent often find themselves falling into the habit of speaking for or defending their neurodivergent loved one. While speaking up on behalf of the neurodivergent can be an important step in creating a more accepting world, one of the best things allies can do for members of the neurodivergent community is making sure they have opportunities for self-advocacy. That starts with something really simple – listening. Instead of assuming or anticipating the needs of your neurodivergent loved one, ask them what they want or need and listen to and honor their responses. By listening, you help neurodivergent people in your life increase their self-awareness and self-confidence in order to feel more comfortable self-advocating. If physicians, educators, or other helping professionals ask you what your neurodivergent loved one needs, let them answer instead. The more opportunities you give a neurodivergent person to ask for and receive what they want and need the better. In this blog, we’ll talk about the benefits of learning self-advocacy for members of the neurodivergent community and some ways that loved ones and allies can support self-advocacy.
What is Self-Advocacy?
Self-advocacy is all about accepting who you are, embracing your neurodiversity, and proudly speaking up for yourself and others who may be in a similar situation. It can feel scary, but you are, truly, the only person who knows just what you need to feel safe and stable and achieve your goals – no matter what you may have been told in your life.
How Do I Self-Advocate?
Becoming a good self-advocate involves the following steps:
- Developing Self-Awareness – understanding and exploring your own needs, wants, and goals in order to be able to advocate for these desires.
- Building Self-Confidence – feeling safe and stable enough in your own, intrinsic worth to express your thoughts and feelings with confidence.
- Finding Opportunities for Self-Expression – there are many ways to do this, and the following are just a few examples:
- If you have an ally in your life who often speaks for you, ask them to allow you to speak for yourself.
- If you use social media, engage with neurodivergent communities online. There are numerous opportunities online to share your experience and advocate for your community.
- If you’re a brave self-advocate who enjoys public speaking, consider offering to share your experiences as a representative of a local advocacy group.
- You may even be able to serve as a self-advocate in your career. Talk to your human resources department about serving as a consultant or representative of neurodiversity in the workplace.
How Does Self-Advocacy Benefit the Neurodivergent Community?
Too often people who are not considered neurodivergent feel the need to speak on behalf of neurodivergent people. This kind of advocacy often focuses on the “otherness” instead of the “sameness” of people in the neurodivergent community. By creating more room for self-advocacy and making an effort to listen to people who are neurodivergent, the world becomes a more inclusive and accepting place. When people within the neurodivergent community are able to self-advocate, they simultaneously make their own lives better while creating a ripple of long-term benefits for other neurodivergent people in their communities.
Can Assessment Help You Become a More Confident Self-Advocate?
Absolutely. We can all know ourselves better and more fully. Undergoing neuropsychological assessment (even if you’ve been tested before) is a great way to better understand your unique set of skills and talents as well as any areas where you may benefit from support services. People are often focused on the results of assessments that can be defined as “negative,” but assessment tests and evaluations are about much more than just a diagnosis. Assessment is about understanding your areas of strength and struggle, so you can feel confident working toward and achieving your goals.
